Escape to Paradise: Stunning Seafront Apartment in Rerik, Germany
Escape to Paradise: Rerik Edition - Because Perfection is a Myth (and Honestly, a Bit Boring)
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because I'm about to spill the tea on "Escape to Paradise: Stunning Seafront Apartment in Rerik, Germany." The name? A bit much, no? But hey, expectations are a killer, and I always have a soft spot for a bit of hyperbole. This review? It's gonna be less polished travel brochure, and more… well, me. Prepare for a rollercoaster of opinions, inconsistencies, and probably some tangents.
First Impressions (and a Slightly Awkward Elevator Ride)
The "stunning seafront" part? Okay, they weren't lying. The view? Absolutely breathtaking. Picture postcard stuff. Think endless Baltic Sea, the salty air kissing your face… but then you have to navigate the parking, and let me tell you, the car park is… functional. Free, mind you, which is a win. Finding the actual apartment building itself? A little bit of a treasure hunt, but eventually, success!
The elevator situation? Less successful. It's one of those old-school ones, the kind that might have seen a bit of action back in the day. I swear, it groaned louder than I did after attempting a particularly ambitious Pilates move. But it moved, and that, friends, is all that matters. Accessibility? Yes, there's an elevator (though the speed may give those with mobility issues a bit to chew on) and, judging from the layout of the shared public areas, they've made a reasonable effort to have some wheelchair accessible features.. Though I didn't personally test it out in a wheelchair, I did see ramps and wide doorways.
The Apartment Itself: Paradise? Debatable. Comfort? Absolutely.
Inside, it’s all clean lines and that calming, minimalist aesthetic that screams "I have my life together” (which, let's be honest, is a lie I tell myself constantly). The Air Conditioning was a lifesaver, especially after the elevator ordeal. The Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! as they scream in their advertising was a huge plus and yes, it was actually decent. I mean, I could stream cat videos, which is the true test of any internet connection, and I never really needed to utilize Internet [LAN] for work.
Now for the details: Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, (who even uses that anymore?!) Bathtub, (thank the heavens!), Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, (a godsend!), Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, (essential!), High floor, In-room safe box, (always a good idea), Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, (Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, ) Satellite/cable channels, Scale, (Soundproofing, Telephone (that I didn't use), Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.
Oh, and the additional toilet, I mean, not for me, but it's always a plus in a holiday rental, right?
The Spa/Sauna/Pool Extravaganza (and the Slight Smell of Chlorine)
Right, let's talk about the "Escape" part. This place really does milk the facilities. Spa/sauna. Yes, indeed. Pool with view. YES. They’ve got the whole shebang: Swimming pool [outdoor], Sauna, Steamroom. I, being a person who believes that a good vacation involves significant amounts of lounging, made it my MISSION to conquer the spa.
The spa area… well, let's just say it's not quite a Roman bath. The Swimming pool, while lovely, had that familiar, slightly over-chlorinated scent. But hey, it's clean! The Sauna was a good sweat, and the Steamroom, well, it did exactly what it promised. Honestly? I think I may have fallen asleep in there. Don’t judge. Massage? Also available. Did I indulge? You bet your bottom dollar. Excellent treatment.
The Food Fiasco (and My Love-Hate Relationship with Buffets)
Okay, the food. This is a mixed bag, folks. There’s a Breakfast [buffet], and let me tell you, there are few things in life quite like the pure, unadulterated joy of piling your plate high with mini-croissants and questionable scrambled eggs. They also did the Breakfast takeaway service - good if you want to eat in your apartment. There’s also a Coffee shop.
They also offered a variety of restaurants, including A la carte in restaurant, Asian cuisine in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, and a Vegetarian restaurant. Honestly, I felt a bit overwhelmed.
Did I mention there was a Poolside bar? Oh, yes. I enjoyed a few cocktails there, watching the sunset. Heaven.
Overall, food-wise? Perfectly adequate. Don't expect Michelin-star quality, but you won't starve.
Cleanliness and Safety (because, You Know, Life)
Let's talk about the boring, but important stuff: Cleanliness and safety. They definitely took Covid seriously. Anti-viral cleaning products were used (yay!), Hand sanitizer everywhere, and the staff seemed well-versed in their safety protocol. They had Daily disinfection in common areas, Rooms sanitized between stays, and staff Staff trained in safety protocol. They even had Individually-wrapped food options:. Which, if you're into that, are great. They do seem to have thought through the whole thing, as there was Physical distancing of at least 1 meter and all of the obvious stuff of Safe dining setup and Sanitized kitchen and tableware items. More importantly, it all felt genuinely clean.
Things to Do (Besides Lounging) and the Whole "Relaxation" Thing
Besides the obvious Swimming pool, Spa, and the endless hours of napping I planned, things to do:
- Fitness center: it exists.. I admit, I walked past it.
- Foot bath: sounds relaxing, but I didn't try it out.
- Gym/fitness: same as above. Things to do:
- Bicycle parking
- Terrace
- Concierge
- Gift/souvenir shop
The "Meh" Factors, and Little Annoyances
No place is perfect, right? Despite a slightly awkward check-in (I blame the language barrier and my terrible German), and the slightly disappointing coffee, this place still delivers.
The Verdict: Should You Escape to Paradise?
Look, is "Escape to Paradise" a perfect name? Maybe… but it's not a lie. It's a great place for some R&R. It’s comfortable, clean, offers a seriously relaxing experience. So, yes, go. Just maybe lower your expectations a tiny bit, pack your own coffee, and be prepared to embrace the imperfections. Because, let’s be honest, life is all about the messy bits, right?
Benidorm Bliss: Your Dream Belvilla Awaits (Costa Blanca Escape!)
Okay, buckle up, buttercups. This isn't your perfectly-planned, Instagram-filtered travel itinerary. This is Rerik, Germany, baby, and we're gonna get wonderfully, gloriously messy. Living in an apartment near the sea? Oh, we're asking for chaos, sunshine, and probably a seagull taking a defiant poop on my balcony.
Rerik Rhapsody: A Messy Sea Symphony (and Maybe a Seagull Attack)
Day 1: Arrival & Initial Panic-Attack-Induced Exploration
- 14:00 - Arrival! Finally. After a train journey that felt like an eternity battling small talk with a very chatty woman who really loves garden gnomes, I'm here. Rerik! The air smells… salty. Like the promise of a thousand forgotten childhoods and the faint reek of something that definitely died on the beach. (Fingers crossed it's not a dolphin this time).
- 14:30 - Apartment Revelation: Okay, the apartment. It's… cozy. Translation: small. But the view! Oh, the view. The Baltic Sea stretches out, a shimmering, deceptive blue. And the balcony! My future haven. Right now, it's covered in what looks like a very ambitious seagull crime scene. Deep breaths. I am not going to let a seagull win. This is war. (Operation: Balcony Reclamation begins tomorrow).
- 15:00 - Grocery Grab & Immediate Regret: Right, gotta eat. Armed with my (admittedly rusty) German, I venture forth. The local Aldi feels like a labyrinth. I manage to procure a loaf of bread, some questionable cheese (it smells… interesting), and a bottle of what I think is apple juice. (Turns out it's sparkling apple juice. A bold choice. I will now refer to myself as "Sparkling Apple Juice Person").
- 16:00 - Immediate Regret Part 2 and a Beach Walk: The cheese is, well, let's just say it's an acquired taste (apparently, I haven't acquired it yet). I head to the beach to lick my wounds. I kick off my shoes, let the sand squish between my toes, and stand here just looking at the sea. Wow! It's actually here. The air is cold, the wind is harsh, I love it!
- 18:00 - Sunset Serenade (and Seagull Sabotage): The sun is setting, painting the sky in orange and pink. It's beautiful. I uncork my sparkling apple juice, toast the view, and BAM! A seagull swoops down, almost grabs the juice. I'd almost forgotten about them. It’s the beginning of my war with seagulls. My view is worth it.
- 20:00 - Dinner, and a Long, Hard Look at Myself: Back at the apartment. I eat my cheese and bread, reflecting on the last few hours. Turns out the bread's stale. I might be terrible at this whole travel thing. Am I having fun? Let's say I'm experiencing things. This is fine.
Day 2: Beach Bliss and the Art of Overthinking Everything
- 08:00 - Seagull Watch: They're out there, perching on the roof, plotting, evil little… (I won't say it). I'm watching them. Very carefully.
- 09:00 - Beach Walk, Take 2: Determined to conquer my fear, I return to the shore. This time, armed with a book. Pride and Prejudice. A classic. Perfect for pretending I'm not completely lost in the world and wondering if I’ll ever properly recover from a bad breakup.
- 11:00 - A Dive into a Painting: I decide to take a look around the pier. I found the perfect painting spot on the pier. I decide to spend an hour painting the sea. I think I messed it up a bit, but its a good try.
- 13:00 - Lunch: I find a small restaurant in the town. I ate a delicious fish dish and ordered a beer. After 10 minutes, I realized how I did not like beer and ordered sparkling apple juice.
- 14:00 - The Battle Continues: I grab my camera and head to the beach again. The sun is out, the sea is beautiful. I take some pictures, the wind tries to knock me down. I laugh, and start taking selfies.
- 17:00 - Sunset and Journaling: The sunset is coming. I find a spot near the sea and start writing in my journal. I write my dreams, my desires, and everything that crosses my mind.
- 20:00 - Dinner and Relaxing: I decide to order from the local restaurant. I spend the evening watching movies and relaxing at my apartment. I felt better.
Day 3: The Quest for… Something. Anything.
- 09:00 - Coffee and Despair: My cheap coffee machine is now working. I drink my coffee and look out the window. A seagull. I glare. It squawks back.
- 10:00 - Rerik exploration: I decide to take a walk around this beautiful town. I walk around, visit some shops, I see some locals.
- 13:00 - Lunch at a Cozy Cafe: I stumble upon a charming cafe and eat a delicious cake. I read a book and let the time passes.
- 14:30 - Un-Beach Time and a Discovery: Instead of the beach, I decide to go to a nearby forest. There is a strange, yet fascinating, beauty in the silence. I spend a while just walking, breathing, and thinking.
- 17:00 - A Surprise Party: I meet some locals who invite me to a party. I dance, I speak, and I feel like I'm not alone.
- 20:00 - Night at the apartment: Before I go to sleep, I start writing in my journal. I think about people, memories, and everything that happened.
Day 4: Farewell, Seagulls (Maybe)
- 08:00 - Last Seagull Watch (and maybe regret): I woke up. Seagulls are there. My war with seagulls is finally over.
- 10:00 - Last Beach Walk: It's time. Last walk on the beach. I walk, I contemplate, I say goodbye to the sea.
- 12:00 - Goodbye: I pack my stuff and leave the apartment. I feel a little sad, but happy. I say goodbye to Rerik.
- 13:00 - Departure: I take a bus to the train station. The time has come and I start my journey back home.
Post-Trip Debrief:
- Seagull Count: Approximately 47 near misses. 0 Direct hits. Victory. (I think).
- Sparkling Apple Juice Consumption: One bottle.
- Emotional State: A delightful mess. Exhausted, but in a good way. I've survived, I've seen the sea, and I might even go back. Eventually.
Is this place *really* as amazing as it looks in the pictures?
Alright, let's be real. The pictures? They're good. *Really* good. Sunlight dancing on the water, perfectly coordinated furniture... it's designed to lure you in. And, okay, I'll admit, walking into "Escape to Paradise" for the first time? Jaw. Dropped. It genuinely felt like someone had ripped a postcard straight from a travel magazine and made it real. That view? Seriously, it's soul-soothing. You could stare out at the Baltic Sea for hours, and I *did*, judging everyone else in Rerik. However, it's also worth noting that the sun wasn't *always* shining. One particular morning, I woke up with a full-blown Baltic Sea fog, like someone had draped a wet, grey duvet over the entire town. Still beautiful. Just... different. And the furniture? Yeah, it's stylish, but I may have knocked over a very expensive-looking vase while trying to do a celebratory dance after successfully making coffee. Oops.
What's the apartment *actually* like? Comfort-wise?
Oh, comfort. Crucial. The bed? Heavenly. I'm pretty sure it was made of clouds and unicorn tears. Or maybe just really good memory foam. Either way, I slept like a baby (a baby who had access to a fully stocked mini-bar, shhh). The sofa? Perfect for collapsing onto after a day of exploring. The heating? Adequate. I did have a slight drama on day two with the hot water - my fault, not theirs, I clearly wasn't using it right, and the panic nearly got me. After a good 15 minutes of cursing in my best broken German, it magically came back to life. Victory! Basically, it’s all set up for maximum relaxation. You *will* want to stay forever.
Okay, but downsides? There *must* be some...
Alright, let's be honest. Perfection is boring. The kitchen, while beautiful, is a little... petite. Don't plan on cooking a Thanksgiving feast in there. I mean, I *tried* to make spaghetti, and it was a tight squeeze. The lighting is a bit mood lighting, I was trying to take some Instagram-worthy photos of my dinner but failed miserably. Oh, and the seagulls. The seagulls are *relentless*. They’re like feathered ninjas, constantly plotting to steal your breakfast pastry. Seriously, guard your food. They’re evil geniuses in disguise. And look, I spent a good day trying to find an iron so I wouldn’t look like a complete mess, not sure if it just wasn’t there or I was a bit blind but the fact remains, no iron!
Let's talk location. Is Rerik actually worth visiting?
Rerik. Oh, Rerik. It's... charming. In a slightly sleepy, "time forgot us" kind of way. The harbor is gorgeous, the beach is sandy, and the locals are friendly (once you get past the initial "are you *sure* you know how to park that thing?" looks). You can wander through the streets, eat ice cream (highly recommended, especially the strawberry), and generally just... chill. It's not exactly a city that is going to provide you with a crazy amount of things to do, but honestly, that’s the point. It is more than a relaxing getaway. This place is for true relaxation. If you want to get drunk in a club until 6 am, this ain’t it. If you want to escape, unwind, and feel your blood pressure drop, then Rerik is perfect.
Is the access to the beach and amenities as easy as it sounds?
Oh boy, let me tell you about "easy access". You're literally steps from the beach. Like, open the door, stumble out, and BAM! Sand between your toes. Heaven. This is where a lot of my time was spent. I could easily spend an entire day on the beach, watching the waves, collecting shells (I have a whole jar now!), and just... being. The local shops and restaurants are also within easy walking distance. This meant a lot of ice cream trips that nearly broke the bank but were 100% worth it. Also, it's worth noting that the beach seems to get more beautiful the more you consume, a lot of drinks were enjoyed, which seems to really open up the beauty of the world around you.
Would you go back? Seriously.
Absolutely, positively, without a shadow of a doubt, YES! I'm already looking at dates, calculating how many vacation days I can "borrow" and mentally preparing myself for the seagulls. It wasn't perfect – nothing ever is, and honestly, that's part of the charm. The minor imperfections, the goofy moments, the pure, unadulterated bliss of waking up to that view every morning… they’re what made it unforgettable. I need more of that in my life. My soul needs it. My liver demands it. GO. Seriously, just go. And don’t forget the insect repellent, those little buggers are not your friend.
Speaking of food... any restaurant recommendations?
Okay, food. This is important. Especially after a few (or ten) Weissbiers. There’s this little place, I think it was called "Restaurant Strandkrug". Don't quote me on the name, I was in a haze of fresh fish and glee. But the food was incredible. Fresh seafood, perfectly cooked. And the atmosphere? Magical. Sat out on the terrace, right on the water, watching the sunset. It was one of those moments where you just stop, breathe in the salt air, and think, "Yep, this is the life." I remember the waiter, he was a very handsome German guy, he couldn't even keep a straight face as I clumsily tried to order in German. And there was another place, a little bakery, the pastries were so good I still dream about them. Don't go there if you're on a diet. You'll fail. Miserably. And I'm not sorry.
Alright, you've sold me. How do I book this place?
Easy there, tiger. You've got to be prepared to fight for this one. I'm not saying there was a *brawl*, but I did experience a fair bit of internet-based desperation when I was trying to secure my dates. I'm not entirely sure, but I think I may have accidentally sent an email toStay Mapped
