Escape to Paradise: Your Dreamy Beachfront Getaway in Egmond aan Zee!
Escape to Paradise: My Beachfront Bliss (and a Few Gripes!) at Egmond aan Zee!
Alright, listen up, because I just got back from a stay at "Escape to Paradise" in Egmond aan Zee, and let me tell you, it wasn't exactly the utopian escape the name implies. But hey, even paradise has a few prickly pear cactus moments, right? This review is gonna be a rollercoaster, so buckle up.
SEO & Metadata (because, you know, gotta keep the Google Gods happy):
- Keywords: Egmond aan Zee, beachfront hotel, Netherlands, spa, fitness, accessible hotel, family-friendly, wifi, dining, review, holiday, vacation, North Sea, accessible rooms, Escape to Paradise.
- Title: Escape to Paradise, Egmond aan Zee: A Review! (Beachfront Bliss, But… )
- Description: A brutally honest review of "Escape to Paradise" in Egmond aan Zee. Find out if the beachfront view, spa, and amenities live up to the hype, with insights on accessibility, dining, cleanliness, and more. Read the full review.
Accessibility: The Good, The Okay, and the "Ugh, What Were They Thinking?"
Okay, let's dive right in, starting with accessibility. This is HUGE for me because my partner, bless her heart, needs wheelchair access. And honestly, "Escape to Paradise" had some wins and some seriously head-scratching misses.
- Wheelchair Accessibility: Yes, there are accessible rooms, and that's a massive plus (I mean, it's 2024!). The room itself was pretty spacious, which was great. We even managed to roll around the terrace and it was truly beautiful. The bathrooms, however, were a mixed bag. Grab rails were in place, but the space around the toilet was… tight, let's just say. I might've had to do a little shimmy to help her in. Overall: a pass, but with room for improvement.
- General Access: Getting around the public areas was mostly okay, with ramps and an elevator. But, and this is a big BUT, some areas seemed to have been planned without considering the needs of people with mobility issues. The entrance to the Spa was a little tricky with a turn and the door was quite heavy, but the staff were there to help us.
- Things to note: The website wasn't completely clear on all the details, so a phone call beforehand to confirm all accessibility features is a must.
On-site Accessible Restaurants/Lounges: A+ for the fact that they HAVE accessible restaurants and lounges. The one big issue?? The bar with the view. It's just, wow! The bar has a lower section and the staff were happy to help make sure there was room for us. So many beautiful memories.
Internet Access (Because, Reality Bites):
- Free Wi-Fi in All Rooms!: YES! And it actually worked! Hallelujah! This is a massive win in my book. No more buffering horrors during movie night.
- Internet [LAN]: Yep, they have LAN connections too, which is a bonus if you're a digital nomad type. But let's be honest, who actually uses those anymore?
- Wi-Fi in Public Areas: More good news here. Pretty reliable, and fast enough to upload a few Instagram stories of the gorgeous sunsets.
Things to Do, Ways to Relax (The "Paradise" Part – Mostly):
Okay, this is where "Escape to Paradise" almost delivers on the name. Almost.
- Spa/Sauna/Steamroom: Yes, yes, and YES! Okay, the spa facilities were top-notch. I did a Body Scrub which left my skin feeling like a baby's bottom, and my partner raved about the Massage, also a win for all who need it. She got a Body wrap, too. The Pool with a view was stunning, overlooking the beach. I spent a solid hour just floating there, blissfully staring out at the North Sea. It was pure magic.
- Fitness Center: I peeked in there once (I'm more of a "walk on the beach" kind of guy myself), and it looked well-equipped. Didn't see any of my types in there though.
- Swimming Pool [outdoor]: Yep, beautiful, perfect for the views.
A Moment of Pure, Unadulterated "Me Time" (and a Slight Mishap)
I'm going to get personal here, because, well, reviews are personal, right? I spent an hour in the Sauna. It was pure, unadulterated relaxation. Like, I started to feel like a melted candle. I probably dozed off. When I finally got out, I somehow managed to trip over a towel and nearly do a faceplant in front of a very attractive woman. I'm still mortified. But hey, the sauna was amazing!
Cleanliness and Safety (Covid-Age Considerations):
This is where "Escape to Paradise" seriously impressed.
- Anti-viral cleaning products: Excellent.
- Daily disinfection in common areas: Good.
- Staff trained in safety protocol: Excellent.
- Rooms sanitized between stays: Reassuring.
- Other good notes: Sanitized kitchen and tableware items and Safe dining setup along with hand sanitizers all over.
They clearly take this stuff seriously, and that's something I really appreciated. I even saw some of the staff sanitizing the elevators which was nice.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking (The Hunger Games):
The food situation at "Escape to Paradise" was a mixed bag, to put it mildly.
- Breakfast [Buffet]: This was the highlight, hands down! A truly amazing buffet, a classic, with all the usual suspects: pastries, eggs, bacon, fruit, muesli… I loved the Western breakfast options, while my partner enjoyed the Asian breakfast – they had amazing rice porridge with ginger.
- Restaurants: Several choices! But, the "a la carte" options… were okay, not amazing. I had a decent soup, but that was the high point.
- Poolside bar: Yes! The most amazing views I had for this stay! They had a great happy hour!
The Fish and Chips Incident
I'm not gonna name names, but I ordered fish and chips from the restaurant one evening and it was… well, let's just say it tasted like it had been swimming in fryer oil for a week. The chips were soggy, the fish was bland. I sent it back. (They did comp me a dessert, which was nice.)
Services and Conveniences (The Little Things):
- Concierge: Very helpful. They helped with arranging transportation and gave us great recommendations for activities.
- Daily housekeeping: Spot on. Our room was always spotless.
- Laundry service: Very handy. Definitely made packing easier.
- Other nice things: Safe deposit boxes, elevators, and a gift shop filled with beachy trinkets.
For the Kids (If You Have 'Em):
- Family/child friendly: Very. I didn't have my kids with me, but I saw several families with young children, and they seemed to be having a great time.
- Babysitting service: Available!
Available in All Rooms (The Nitty-Gritty):
- Air conditioning: Essential.
- Free Wi-Fi: (mentioned before, but worth repeating!)
- Refrigerator: Great for keeping the beer cold.
- Hair dryer: Check.
- Coffee/tea maker: Also check. Essential to wake up.
- Slippers: Very cute!
- Blackout curtains: Helped with staying in bed.
Getting Around:
- Car park [free of charge]: Big time win, especially in a coastal town.
- Bicycle parking: Yes! Which is perfect for exploring Egmond aan Zee.
The Verdict (Drumroll, Please):
"Escape to Paradise" in Egmond aan Zee is a lovely place, with a good location, good amenities, and lots of potential. It's not perfect - that fish and chips was a low point, and the accessibility could be more consistently excellent - but the good parts really are good. The spa is fabulous, the beach is stunning, the staff are generally friendly, and who can argue with a view of the North Sea?
Would I go back?
Yes. Definitely. And I'd recommend it…with a few caveats! Pack some snacks, double-check the specifics of accessibility if you require it, and maybe avoid the fish and chips.
Belgium's BEST Sauna & Pool Holiday Home: Unwind & Rejuvenate!
Okay, buckle up, buttercups. This isn't your perfectly-Photoshopped Instagram itinerary. This is the real, messy, hilarious, and occasionally slightly disastrous account of my trip to that cozy holiday home near the beach in Egmond aan Zee. Consider this less a schedule and more a collection of war stories.
Egmond aan Zee: The Real Deal (aka, My Brain Dump of a Holiday)
Day 1: Arrival and the Case of the Rogue Luggage
- Morning: The journey. Ugh. Trains, a late coffee, and the vague dread of packing your life into a suitcase – the usual pre-holiday symphony of chaos. Honestly, I'm convinced the Dutch train system is designed to test your patience. We arrive in Egmond, bags in tow (except, not all bags. My favourite scarf went AWOL somewhere between Amsterdam and the coast. Heartbreak! It was that perfect shade of teal…)
- Afternoon: The cozy holiday home! I was picturing idyllic charm, maybe a vase of freshly-picked tulips. What we got was… well, it was near the beach. And small. Very small. But clean! Thank goodness because I was picturing the worst. After a whirlwind tour of the property we put the luggage down and took a deep breath of seaside air, and all was forgiven. Almost. The unpacking was another level of messy.
- Evening: Food shopping! Armed with a list that I'd meticulously crafted (and promptly misplaced) we hit the local supermarket. The Dutch are champions of the kaasmarkt, and I knew I had to go for it. My inner cheese-fiend was ecstatic. After buying at least three different cheeses, a ridiculous amount of stroopwafels and some essentials, we hauled our stash back to the house. Dinner was a triumph (pasta! garlic bread!), followed by the ultimate holiday treat: a board game. We are terrible at board games, arguments ensued, and the night ended in a fit of giggles.
Day 2: Beach, Bikes, and Existential Angst
- Morning: Beach time! The sea. The sand. The salty air. Pure bliss. I swear, staring at the vast ocean has a way of making all your problems shrink. We spent a good hour just wandering, collecting seashells, and feeling very small and insignificant. Which, honestly, is sometimes the best feeling. Then the wind picked up. And my hair started to resemble a bird's nest. But still, amazing!
- Afternoon: Bikes! We rented bikes. This was supposed to be a leisurely cycle along the coast. Instead, it turned into a comedy of errors. My bike's brakes were dodgy, my partner nearly took out a flock of seagulls, and I, in a moment of sheer stupidity, tried to cycle uphill. We all had to admit defeat and returned the bike.
- Evening: The mood of the sunset! We watched the sunset from a local beach cafe, the best fries in the world, and a beer to go along with it. A perfect end of a perfect imperfect day.
Day 3: The Lighthouse, The Fish, and the Existential Sea-Shanty Vibe
- Morning: The Lighthouse! A short trek along the dunes. What a view! I'd love to live in a lighthouse, all alone, listening to the waves crash. It's just the thought of being confined for so long, the lack of groceries, and the fear of going mad that holds me back…
- Afternoon: Fish! So, Egmond is a fishing town by day, and a party town by night. We bought fresh fish. I'd never cooked fish before. I asked the fishmonger for advice, and I swear he looked at me like I was from another planet. I burnt it. Then I ate a large bowl of fries and considered my life choices.
- Evening: The Sea-Shanty! A beer at the local pub felt like the perfect end. The pub was full of sea dogs. As the evening drew darker, I realized I wanted to stay there forever.
Day 4: The Quest for the Perfect Poffertjes and a Last-Minute Panic
- Morning: Poffertjes! I'd heard tales of these tiny, fluffy Dutch pancakes. The MISSION: find the perfect ones. This involved a pilgrimage to a street market, a queue that snaked around the block, and a near-miss with a rogue toddler. Was it worth it? Oh, HELL YES. The poffertjes were little bites of heaven, drizzled with butter and dusted with powdered sugar. Worth it.
- Afternoon: The beach, again! We went for a long walk to try to walk off all of the food we were eating. I swear, I ate almost all of my socks.
- Evening: The panic. Suddenly, the holiday was ending. We were packing, I noticed a weird stain on the sofa, and I realized I hadn't bought any souvenirs. Panic mode activated!
- Late Night: Souvenir situation resolved. The stain? Left a note apologizing.
Day 5: Departure and the Undeniable Truth.
- Morning: The leaving. I'm not a morning person. Waking up on the last day of a holiday is always the worst. Packing, loading our bags, and making our way back to the trains and back home.
- Afternoon: The memory of the holiday. As I sat on the train back I realized the holiday had been perfect in its imperfection. Yes, there were glitches. Yes, there were mishaps. But it was real. It was human. It was funny. And most importantly, it left me with a heart full of memories. I think I would go back to Egmond in a heartbeat!
So there you have it. Not exactly a Michelin-starred itinerary, but definitely a trip I'll never forget. And if, by some miracle, you're planning your own trip to Egmond aan Zee, remember: embrace the mess, the mishaps, and the mediocre cooking. Embrace the salty air, the sea, and the stroopwafels. And, most importantly, embrace the chaos. Because that's where the real fun – and the best memories – are made.
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Escape to Paradise: Egmond aan Zee Edition - Frequently Asked, and Probably Googled, Questions
Okay, seriously, is this "Escape to Paradise" place REALLY as dreamy as the brochures make it sound? Because I've been burned before...
What's the deal with the weather? I'm picturing sunshine every day. Don't want to be disappointed.
How close are you *really* to the beach? The website says "beachfront"...
Are there shops and restaurants nearby? I don't want to spend my entire vacation cooking (or existing on instant noodles).
What about activities? Besides, you know, staring at the ocean.
Are the units clean? I’m a bit of a germaphobe. (Don't judge me!)
Is it kid-friendly? I'm bringing the little terrors... I mean, angels...
Anything I should know before I go? Any hidden costs?
